you really think your child does not need sex education? :)

Ratna*, 7 year old school going kid  comes home after school and says to mother on a funny tone: ” mom, today we had a great day while playing games. In the skipping competition, I won 25 kisses from my sports teacher for completing 100 skippings. 

Roja*, 14 year old says to his mother – “mom, i dont know whether it is right or wrong to tell you, but since you are my best friend, just listen. today my classmate suddenly gave a tight hug to me in front of all my classmates. I didn’t know how to ract, I just slapped him and began crying loudly. My principal came and the scene grew messier. now what should I do? “

The parents of Ratna* & Roja* are very lucky! because, their beloved daughters are making an effort to explain the happening to them. In some instances, some kids just keep quite, fearing rejection, punishment, embarassment, …”you only must have provoked him….” 

Ramya*, 16  year old girl writes in her dairy    ”….. today again, I was bullied upon by my uncle. As usual, I was tempted to tell it to mom. but again….. our family financial condition, dependancy on my uncle, regarding loans, etc came to my mind and I just gulped in the bitterness & kept quite.”

Raju*, 12 year old confesses to his friend,  ” Da, my uncle squeezes my… you know the inner part, and sometimees I feel happy about it, and sometimes it really hurts. I dont know how to react. what should I do ? “

 

Ram*, 17 year ld tells to his friend – “yesterday night, some pus like gummy thing from my penis. is it AIDS man? oh! god, I am scared to death.”

Moral of these stories: 

• Sex education is NOT education about how sexual intercourse is done. 
• A proper syllabus according to the age of the children should be drawn. 
• Eg: 1. 5-7 year old – what to do when some elders (teachers, relatives etc) touch private parts of the child – inform immediately to mom or papa.  How to behave with fellow boys and girls. What you should do when someone is behaving closely with you and you are scared – cry loud, scream for help, call your teacher, papa or mummy immediately. etc. 
•     Eg 2: 16-18 year old – what is masturbation, is it right or wrong, does it really cause any disease… etc. what are the consequnce of a love relationship. what are the consequence of live in relationship, how married life is stabler than the other kind of relationships, what are the moral and ethic perspectives involved? how to react to the parent’s disagreement. what is safe sex? how safe is it to use a condom,what are the preautionary measures to aoid sexual harassment, what are the legal provisions, how you are legally protected, how you can legally fight back? what are the rganizations working for this cause…..

Message to those naysayers about sex education: Please learn about the improtance before your child is a victim of a sexual abuse, rape or icnest. If you think that your child is absolutely safe, try asking him a few questions pertaining to above discussed matters. The reply should be interesting.

How to know your child is in trouble?

1. Child will show signs of fear upon hearing to some of your relative’s name.

2. Injury marks near to groins, severe itching sensation in the groins, or any severe skin infections

3. Highly depressed mood of the child, not willing to mingle with friends and family members, Highly irritable, lack of interest in food and activities, repeated crying spells.

How to approach the troubled child?

Talk very gently (already the child is in a lot of pain).

Assure that you will not hurt him/ her in any ways if he/she tells the truth.

Take the child into your confidence, love him/her, gift something. show that your full support is there with him/her.

Encourage the child to explain everything. This will help in assessing the amount of damage.

 

* The names and plots used in this article are fictions.